I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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