His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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