My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
