I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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