I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
