I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
