Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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