girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
