That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
