Umm I'm too high to move.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
