I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
