why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
