what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Randomize
