dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
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