Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize
