First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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