The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
