Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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