38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I cut my penus on the lid.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
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