Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
