Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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