how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize