so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
