i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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