id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Never underestimate the power of titties
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
