Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
how drunk are you?
Several
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
