Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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