the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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