It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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