He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Randomize
