just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
