i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
