Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Randomize
