He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
