I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
