They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Randomize
