This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize
