I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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