Christians are straight up FREAKS
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Randomize