jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
