why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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