Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
