Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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