i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Randomize