I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
