the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
