What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
