someone owes me an orgasm
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
