Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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