I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
